Just Keep Swimming...

Thanks to mean people who create and deploy viruses, my computer has been non functional for several weeks; so I'm hijacking a few minutes at school to post an update and I'm not sure when the next post will be. I'm praying for the possibility of a laptop for my upcoming b-day, so we'll see.

Things are moving along...slowly. As of today, I am 11wks and 4days along and can only fit comfortably into 1 pair of regular jeans and 1 pair of regular dress pants.

This pregnancy is soooo much different that the last two. I am soooo sick, the nausea is unbelievable. I am not able to have either of my favorite things, coffee (or any caffinated beverage) or chocolate (actually anything sweet has my stomach rolling). I am having cravings, but when I eat what I was craving, it makes me sick...AND I am soooooo tired. I am a night owl, early for me is 11:30 to 12:00pm and I have been in bed and passed out by 8:30 almost every night. Oh and I can smell literally everything.

On the bright side, I am eating much healthier than I have before. I am able to tolerate water and lots of it, fruit, and just about any kind of veggie salad. I have switched to whole grain everything and now have a taste for almonds...plain almonds. Weird hu. But I still like the carbs...potatoes, stuffing, french fries...Hello lover!!!

One thing I am craving is a Subway Tuna sandwich, but I have heard that tuna has been linked to Autism. Do any of you know about that??

Yesterday we found out that another teacher at my school is pregnant, about 7 weeks. So just a little behind me, and for some strange reason I found that to be comforting as far as my fears are concerned. Maybe it's the strength in numbers thing...LOL...I don't know.

I am still having the afraid of dying issue, but I think I am coming around as things move along. the thought still crosses my mind, but I don't feel so panicky about it. But as I said before, I have had this fear since Jacob passed. I just keep reminding myself that women have babies everyday and both mom and baby are fine.

I am still in the cautiously optimistic stage but have set up a vote boy vote girl station in my classroom for my students to put in for what they think I am having. Rick and just about all of my family and friends think it Will be a girl; but I really don't care as long as we are both alive and healthy in the end.

February 26th is Jacob's would be 2nd birthday and we are going to have a graveside balloon release in his honor. Be praying about this as I want to but don't want to do it. We are going to fill balloons with helium and a salvation message; then release them on his birthday. Our hopes in doing this are for someone to run across one of the balloons and receive the salvation message in turn accepting Christ. And also to ensure that Jacob is never forgotten. I have found that as time passes, the physical wounds heal, and the reminders of him begin to fade. Like the picture on the wall that you walk by everyday but don't really notice. When there isn't an active reminder, it is almost as if nothing really happened. So his puts us in a place where we are choosing to actively remember him. I'm sure it will be difficult, but God will have His hands on us and it will be fine.

I am back to the OBGYN next Friday, the 12th for my 12 week check up and sonogram, so I hope to have more good news and pictures to share. But in case my pc is still down, I wish you all a wonderful Valentines Day and know that I think of you often.

Have a Blessed Day,
April